Burning To Tell You

You know what it's like
when you like the person, but you never can quite get it out?

It's like your sentences
never run
together
and each part just keeps running on in your mind
but your lips never catch up?

I feel that way sometimes when I think of him
and tears well up deep inside me
Because I will never have him like I should.
I will never be able to hold him like I used to
and when I talk to him now
all I hear is the happy voice of him
moving on.

Far away and still running
I can taste the memory of what we should have been
and I am still crying
Hoping that he will know.

It was supposed to be us!
I know I have wrecked it all,
but it should have been us!
Doesn't he know what it takes!
All I want is him!

But I cannot.
I am here and
he is still there
moving on,
smiles in his voice
and his talk of his future.

It used to ours.
My future and his
combined into one.
But now it is simply that,
his
and
mine.

Different lines, different times
Places
Completely unique,
and my mind keeps going faster than my lips
when all I want to do is beg for his love.

But it is gone.

I wish he knew how much I need him
Like cinnamon on applesauce,
he just fit.
But I will never taste it again
so maybe I should just put the applesauce up
because I think it has gone bad anyway.