A Comment On "The Worst Good Thing"

I did not want to keep intruding on your blog, so tonight my comment goes out to you from my own. You know who you are.

I never meant to make you feel guilty. That is the exact opposite of the reason I did what I did. I was, and am, trying to lighten your load, but I have failed you again. I am sorry for that.

The reason you see it in my eyes is because I let you, I could lie to you just as easily as I lie to the world. There are few who can see suffering when they do not want to, there are even fewer who can see suffering when it is well hidden.

I will do anything for you. I care deeply for you, you are my best-friend. I meant it when I said I would die for you. What do think I am doing inside of myself tonight?

Do not worry, I know that I have you when I fall, so I will survive this. You are worth everything, if to nobody else than me! I need you to take care of yourself, and if that means no third option, than I will survive without it.

Look at your life! FOR GOD'S SAKE MAN, take something for yourself! Selfishness is not a sin when it is REQUIRED for SURVIVAL! You asked for something out of me, and I gave it, please just take it and do not say another word. I do not need thanks, and you do not need to further injure yourself over it!

Please take care, and always remember, I got your back.

-First Mate Nat